Fat Fish (A Song)

Once there was a fat fish
Swimming along
Swam right into
A Cayman’s jaws

He didn’t see it comin’
He was having a great day
It happened very fast
And he couldn’t get away

There once was a grasshopper
Sittin’ on a leaf
An invisible chameleon
Thought it was a treat

It was a well adapted lizard
Even fatter than the fish
It’s tongue was like a missile
Very fast and couldn’t miss!

There was a little kitty
Named Penelope
She was itchin’ for some Friskies
Or some Chicken of the Sea

Oh she had no natural predators
‘Cause she never went outside
But she needed a can opener
In order to survive!

The chameleon has some eggs
But a fat snake eats them up
Your life is just a matter of
Exactly what’s for lunch

Once a water buffalo
With a dragon in pursuit
Was bathing by the river side
It didn’t give a hoot

But the buffalo it fell
It took about a week
The dragon having time to spare
Enjoyed a gradual feast

If you’re wondering, right about now
When it’s time to eat
You’ll get the most out of your meal
With nobody nibbling at your feet!

Exactly where and when
All alone or in a bunch …
The details can be critical
When you find out what’s for lunch!

Once in the magical kingdom
All walked into a bar
Cat, cayman and chameleon
To try the salmon du juor

Despite their obvious differences
At a table the three sat
Discussing their ideals
A meal and then a nap

Everyone was safe for now
From the north to south
The chameleon kept his tongue
Rolled up in his mouth

And deep in the ocean
Said the talking cat
The universe is all good
When the fish are fat!

Seriously Cute
me and a sealion
The author doing research in Mexico.

Note: the slippery monster in the photos is Cassandra Sealion in the Puerto Vallarta area of Mexico, and me. She’s a lion; she opened her mouth, and I looked in! I highly recommend looking Cassandra up if you’re down that way!

“Fat Fish” is also a two-chord song I like to perform; I’ll do a video for you soon. The lyric (above) was inspired by the Attenborough documentary “Life.”

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