Dear Fred The Manatee,
You lazy bastard.
You don’t know what I like! I’m a big fan of manatees; I just don’t like you! You can punch me in the nose any time; it would be funny. I could move my nose easily before you ever reached it.
Ever since the TV documentary, you manatees have done nothing but bask in the glory. Now I come up with a good name and you think you can just steal it? You won’t get a nickel.
And I don’t think you’ll ever get past forming a committee, and by the way, moving to Mexico was my idea, too. Are you going to make another documentary and claim you came up with all these ideas?
I think I’ll put your face on the cover of the CD.
Your Friend,
Mark