Dear Fred The Manatee,
Thank you for contacting me.
I’m sorry you thought I was being harsh. I’m not sure I agree, but it’s becoming more important to me every day to consider your case a priority because it’s the kind of news people care about.
Even though you’re just an underwater snuffleupagus nobody asked to swim around everywhere really slowly, I respect your right to equal access to warmer water, and wish you the best in your aimless, careless drifting.
I’d suggest you hire a puppy to be your press agent, though. At least the sad face thing doesn’t work for you. Also, remember if you end up drifting down to Mexico, they might make you work like a sealion entertaining tourists. The water’s warmer, you just have to pull your own, and I don’t think you could handle it.
Toodles,
Mark